Why We Never Became A Thing

I’m sorry I couldn’t let you in
Because I haven’t cleaned the insides of my heart, yet.
I haven’t packed the boxes of things which were his
I haven’t decided on whether to cherish or throw, yet.

I can’t be that audacious to let you stay at place
That once belonged to him
The place which I once decorated with fairy lights and candles
Which now has the remains of us
The dilapidated surroundings
Along with the cobwebs and dust
The walls which still has pictures of him
Even though I have ripped them off of my bedroom wall.

I’m sorry for not being completely with you
Because when I looked at you,
I was just looking for the pieces of him
A faint resemblance
A hint of him.

I know it was unfair,
The cruelest thing.
That’s why we never
Became a thing!